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Top 10 Reasons Why Lance Armstrong is Coming Back

Why is Lance getting back on the saddle?

Lance Armstrong confessed today that he will return to professional cycling in 2009. Well, here is top 10 real reasons why Lance is coming back.

10. Lance wants to prove he wasn’t doping during his first 7 Tour de France victories by winning again.
9. Winning the Tour de France is at least 7 times more fun than working for a non-profit.
8. Lance is loosing sex appeal and not getting any more hot celebrity dates.
7. Lance can’t stand preppy argyle kids eating burritos touted as the premiere American cycling team.
6. Lance wants to continue the streak of worst luck for Levi Leipheimer and make sure Levi never wins the Tour.
5. Lance finally realized that he’s not good at anything else except turning his legs in circles.
4. Lance’s kids can’t figure out what their dad does for living "strong" and Lance can’t explain to them either.
3. Trek developed a carbon fiber bone transplant that reduces Lance’s weight by 40 lbs and virtually eliminates any chance of breaking bones during a crash.
2. Lance (37) just got spanked by a 44 year old Dave Wiens in a 100 mile dirt bike race.
1. Lance is tired of hearing uni-baller jokes from RAGRAI hacklers.


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